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Monday, December 5, 2011

Body butter is misleading. It should be edible.

(ADD Gabi sits alone on a park bench, quietly singing to herself.)


ADD Gabi: Birthday, birthday, having fun on birthdayyyyy. . .


Musical Gabi: You can't harmonize with yourself, you know.


ADD Gabi: I was singing a birthday song!


Coah Gabi: YOU HAVE NO TIME TO SING! YOU HAVE A TOURNAMENT ON WEDNESDAY!


Sports Commentator: Score! Gabi has successfully spelled Wednesday correctly for the first time! And she does it again! The crowd goes wild!


Honest Gabi: There is no crowd. Does anybody else see the crowd?


Scholarly Gabi: I agree with you! And we can even use Occam's Razor to disprove the crowd if it gets really down and dirty.


Girly Gabi: This is why I don't have a social life, guys!


Poetic Gabi: But you wrote a novel last month which you can easily turn into a metaphor for society!


Overachiever Gabi: Why do you need a social life when you are an executive member of three clubs, an active member of five, have wrestling practice six times a week, are an executive member of a youth group and organize monthly events, have a babysitting job, and need to get good marks? This is your future, Gabi.


Girly Gabi: One of my friends greets me every day with, "Hi Gabi! Hang out with us more." I need a social life.


Coach Gabi: I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE THINKING. NO. YOU MAY NOT QUIT WRESTLING, DO YOU HEAR ME?!


Gabi's Body: Can we go to sleep now? Please?


ADD Gabi: In a minu- OH LOOK IT'S A LINK THAT THE ATTRACTIVE BOY FROM DRAMA LAST YEAR POSTED!


20 minutes later


ADD Gabi: Who would have thought that he was trolling?


Gabi's Body: It is bed time. Go to sleep. Your birthday is over and you have no excuse any more and I am tired and soon I will fall asleep on the keyboard and get little key indents on my face.


Girly Gabi: Not the face! 


*******************************************


That was yesterday. 


Scholarly Gabi: A good part of it was this morning, actually.


I don't care. 


Gabi's Body: Can we sleep again?


It's only nine p.m.! I really would like to produce an entire post. Anyway. I could go through my birthday presents, but since people know me, I mostly got Chapters/Indigo gift cards. I also got a couple of unicorns, but hey, you know. Those are pretty standard these days.


Nice Gabi: Maybe you should write thank you cards! And the journal your brother got you was sweet!


Honest Gabi: It had skulls on the cover. It has the words "chaotic," "poetic," "frantic," and "romantic" on it. It's ugly.


Teenager Gabi: It even takes itself too seriously to me.


Creative Gabi: Oooh, can I make a collage on it?! It will be a pretty collage!


I should have mentioned at some point that notebooks have personalities to me. My notebook has to be my friend. Strange Gabi is strange.


Alright, I am going to go now. 


Oh! I will be participating in the Teens Can Write Too blog chain. I encourage all of you to check it out! I've never really written on this blog for a set date before, so I am sort of nervous, but hopefully it will go well.


<3 Gabi


Strange captcha word of the day:
Cookines (v.) Being so excited about freshly baked goods that one misspells words like cookie.
Gabi cookines each and every time she smells chocolate chip cookies in the oven.

12 comments:

  1. Reading this was a little like watching WTF Collective, by Jon Lajoie.

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  2. Yay Gabi! I like body butter, I have this one that is all scrubby and you can use it like soap, so basically it's for lazy people :D

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  3. All my journals have to be especially tuned to my mood when I pick them out =)

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  4. I spent a looong time decoding the troll :P

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  5. Is it sad that I got excited because I knew what Occam's razor is?

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  6. First time reading, and this is probably one of my top ten hilarious things in the world.

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  7. How do all those Gabi's fit in that head of yours? Or maybe you're like Gollum in LOTR? Awesome. Are you taking the Hobbits to Isengard? More awesome.

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  8. No offense, but you really ought to consider getting on some Lithium. It did wonders to quell all those squabbling voices in my head. :)

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