A lot of people have been shoving food down my throat lately.
Honest Gabi: No, just you.
Girly Gabi: Seriously, you ate a fifth of a cheesecake. Like, do you know how many calories are in that?
Poetic Gabi: It went down my throat so quickly. Its life was fleeting, but beautiful.
ADD Gabi: I really like cheesecake. And carrots. I ate an entire bag of mini carrots last week.
Coach Gabi: INCREASING YOUR VITAMIN A INTAKE, ARE YOU?! THEN WHY ARE YOU ATROCIOUS AT WRESTLING?
Scholarly Gabi: Those aren't correlated. Vitamin A is responsible for vision. And, as it was the first wrestling practise --
Random Bystander: You wrestle? That's funny because I see you as clumsy, socially awkward, and a pushover.
Yeah, I joined the wrestling team. Since my family burst into laughter upon hearing this, I've decided to compile a list of reasons why I'm manly. In a feminine, sexually viable way.
a) According to the Jew sitting beside me force-feeding me noodles, I have manly thumbs. But they're handsome.
b) I could probably use my hair as a weapon.
c) I'm wearing a flannel plaid shirt. I'm totally a lumberjack.
d) I'm a Gryffindor.
Scholarly Gabi: No, you are not. Pottermore clearly made an analytical error, and you're clearly in Ravenclaw.
Overachiever Gabi: HOW CAN YOU BE A RAVENCLAW IF YOU GOT 35% ON A SCIENCE QUIZ TODAY!?
ADD Gabi: I'm on the same dose of meds I've been on since grade 4. I may need a higher dose. And I was thinking about the blog's anniversary and what we could write about.
Overachiever Gabi: Gabi, get your prescription changed please.
Nice Gabi: See, that was a pretty nice suggestion! We may even belong in Hufflepuff!
Honest Gabi: You're a Ravenpuff. You also have really unhealthy sleeping habits and you are self-absorbed.
ADD Gabi: I just ate an ice cream bar in, like, 45 seconds! It was so cool! We can write about that on the blog's anniversary post!
Girly Gabi: That's stupid! Everyone's going to think you're fat and, like, hate you. We should write about my new wardrobe!
Teenage Gabi: Can we write about how much more mature I am than a year ago, but how I'm also jaded and world-weary?
Poetic Gabi: We could use my seven plaid shirts as a metaphor!
Honest Gabi: See, you're so self absorbed! In the middle of a list about yourself, you felt compelled to add an entire conversation between the different aspects of your personality, and argue about the blog's anniversary post.
ADD Gabi: Today's the blog's anniversary? OH YEAH, I KNEW THAT!
Overachiever Gabi: Nobody's going to finish the list, are they? Nobody does any work around here. Ugh.
Yeah, I've had this blog for a year. That's weird.
I didn't really want to do one of those I've Had My Blog For a Year and That's Awesome posts, because they're awesome, but I don't have enough posts that I'm proud of. So this year's goal is to make more good quality posts, I suppose. I kind of already defeated my purpose in this post, because it sucks. Yay.